If you’re a regular reader of this column you probably already have your own Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie to protect your brain from mind control. And if you don’t know what I’m talking about, head over to www.zapatopi.net/afdb where you can learn how to make your own tin foil hat which, according to the website, “blocks most forms of brain scanning and mind reading, keeping the secrets in your head truly secret.” However, if you need a head covering designed specifically to prevent an alien abduction, you’ll need to go to www.stopabductions.com for simple instructions for building your own “Thought Screen Helmet,” a device which stops aliens from abducting and controlling humans. The Thought Screen Helmet will block telepathic communication between aliens and humans which will prevent aliens from immobilizing, controlling, or abducting you. Only two failures since 1988, boasts the website.
9.21.2005
CONDOMS FOR YOUR BRAIN
If you’re a regular reader of this column you probably already have your own Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie to protect your brain from mind control. And if you don’t know what I’m talking about, head over to www.zapatopi.net/afdb where you can learn how to make your own tin foil hat which, according to the website, “blocks most forms of brain scanning and mind reading, keeping the secrets in your head truly secret.” However, if you need a head covering designed specifically to prevent an alien abduction, you’ll need to go to www.stopabductions.com for simple instructions for building your own “Thought Screen Helmet,” a device which stops aliens from abducting and controlling humans. The Thought Screen Helmet will block telepathic communication between aliens and humans which will prevent aliens from immobilizing, controlling, or abducting you. Only two failures since 1988, boasts the website.
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