I’M JUST REALLY CONSTIPATED

A strange tale out of Ness City, Kansas, this week involves a 35-year-old woman who stayed on her boyfriend’s toilet for two years, long enough for her skin to meld with the seat leaving her body physically attached to the toilet. After two years of feeding her and asking her to come out of the bathroom (to which she would invariably reply “maybe tomorrow”) her boyfriend finally called the police for some professional help. Police found the clothed woman sitting on the toilet, her sweat pants down to her mid-thigh, looking "somewhat disoriented.” “She was not glued. She was not tied. She was just physically stuck by her body," said an officer who helped pry the seat from the toilet so that the girl could be taken to the hospital. No explanation was given as to why the man waited two years to cal the police. (MercuryNews.com)