AND THE MINDLESS ZOMBIE COUCH POTATO AWARD GOES TO...

If you had listened to me last year when the world record for marathon TV watching was a mere 47 hours you could have had your name in the record books by now. Instead, you’re now going to have to watch over 69 hours and 48 minutes of utter crap in order to break the world’s easiest record. Yes, a man named Suresh Joachim has successfully melted his brain and simultaneously gained worldwide infamy (but probably no chicks) by watching almost 70 hours of television in a row. According to the rules laid down by Guinness, a 5-minute break is allowed every hour plus a 15-minute break every eight hours. Joachim now holds 16 world records, including longest duration balancing on one foot (76 hours, 40 minutes) and bowling for 100 hours. (MSNBC)